realm's word

We’ve all heard the term ‘slept on’ used by ‘holier than thou art’ music reviewers who are so short-sighted that they genuinely believe that they’re the only people to have heard certain songs or artists.

To me, the term refers to artists or songs that were never appreciated for their true genius, be it an unknown album by a popular artists or a musician who never quite reached the dizzy heights of their potential with recordings being in limited supply and once sold out, lost to the depths of a dusty record box.

Few genre’s are slept on more than Jazz and Funk and for obvious reasons.

Jazz comes in various guises and whilst many would love to love it, they just can’t get into the raw, artistic musings of a live musicians ten minute solo epic which is so often the deterrent to so many Jazz-club first timers. For me, Jazz remains the modern day’s most pure form of music and remains the antithesis of ‘cool’, even if it’s a genre that has in reality changed little since its conception.

Funk is easier for the masses to swallow and digest. It is, on face value, light hearted and comes with the head-nodding element. That said, a popular Funk track will in most cases require some sort of repetitive hook to allow for crowds to learn the words and sing along to, or alternatively have a decent ‘break’ which subsequently allowed DJ’s to mix, cut and juggle whilst the B-boys do their ‘thang’. Funk is designed for clubs in the same way that Disco was, the former subsequently created Hip Hop and the latter started the House music movement. The former gained popularity whilst being ‘publically’ played in Punk Rock clubs and the latter was ideal for the Gay scene – then record labels and money got involved with both.

In true cyclical fashion we now see modern day derivatives of Hip Hop, ‘RnB’ and ‘Rap’ merging together where artists collaborate to ensure commercial success across both fan bases (see Jay-Z and R. Kelly collabo albums as proof). However, as the genre has exhausted creativity and top name producers have all seen their hay days after years of hard work (Neptunes, Timbaland et al have been around for a LONG time and only recent got full recognition as artists in their own right) and where has ‘RnB/Rap’ moved to?

Answer: House.

Replacing the lower tempo beats normally associated with the genre, RnB/Rap musicians have noticed a decrease in their popularity as target audiences grow older and so in order to move with the times, artists such as Ne-Yo and others now incorporated their RnB style with an up tempo, club friendly House beat. On the more strict House music side, we see the increasing incorporation of live instruments to add more depth to the bland 4/4 beats which put deter so many through repetition. Of course, there’s Funky House, Jazzy House and hundreds of other variations. Rnb, Rap and Hip Hip too have sub genre’s where some artists try to stay true to ‘proper’ music.

It’s almost an admission in my view, that musicians of said genres tend to lean towards incorporating original elements of other foundation genre’s in order to add credibility to their music. Don’t get me wrong, I still listen and I really enjoy fusion music.

I compare music to textile fashion though. My wardrobe changes in colours, patterns and cuts. However the constants remain: I still wear Trousers, Shirts, Jackets, Shoes, Socks etc and furthermore, within those main categories of clothing, I will always have a classic White Shirt.

The White Shirt is to my wardrobe what Jazz is to my music - The one true constant that works with everything, no matter what the fashion.

You can quote me on that, perhaps it’ll be etched on my grave in 70 years or so.

This all brings me back to my original point, many artists are ‘slept on’ but none so much as in the Jazz genre where the music has and seemingly will always remain the artistic expression of emotion that is perhaps only ever truly understood by one person – the musician who made it.

It wasn’t my intention, but it seems the day emerging along my path as designed by the forces of evil is in some sort of perpetual annoyance scheme, has driven me to the point where I require a canvas on which to paint my frustrations. If my mind state today was a picture, it would strike a resemblance to something straight out of David Bowie’s Labyrinth movie – I’m talking upside-down stairs leading to doors which lead to rooms full of doors mounted on the floor. In a nutshell, today’s one of ‘those’ days, everything that I find frustrating has happened so far.
Since my Yoghurt and Fruit meal, I’ve taken a trip to the local shop to buy my lunch and second lunch (Since you asked: Chicken (dark meat) and Pilau rice. Later, Chicken (white meat) with Caesar salad.)
That’s where the first annoyance took place. The cashier put my shopping through his barcode scanner and I duly packed the contents into a bad. He told me the bill total, I paid in cash. Upon taking the paper-form currency from my light grip, the cashier looked up and smiled in my direction and for a moment I was sure his pupils were vertical, ellipse shape with a rouged tint. I thought nothing of it and awaited my change and in that moment it all became clear as I held out my left hand, fingers close together, palm flat. The cashier leant over and I observed as if stuck in some sort of flux state whilst the receipt was placed into my palm followed by some small change on top. Unsuspecting, I moved my hand horizontally back towards my body but no matter how slowly I moved the frictionless surface areas of both receipt paper and coins made for a slippery movement and like an over-rushed waiter carrying too much food on a tray, the coins slipped off.
Question: How do we make it a law that all cashiers must place coins in your hand before the paper receipt? Or is that too much to ask?
Note to self, always pay by card.

Secondly, there is a black BMW car parked on the street outside and for two days, it’s alarm has been irritating me.

That is all.

Since my previous post today, I have eaten my mid-morning Yoghurt and Fruit meal (my gym trainer has put me on some crazy, strict 5 meals per day regimen – I’m not overweight, if that’s what you’re thinking – I’m hoping to gain a pound or two and get healthier, inside and out).

I’m at work, in the office and so eating takes second place to menial office tasks and phone calls. Perhaps this post is going to give you a less rose-tinted view of me as I would like to share a couple of annoyances, the nauseating happenings in day to day life that many would deem as trivial, but in my mind are in fact as irritating as wearing the same T-shirt in which you had your hair cut last time you wore it (those tiny, prickly hairs which get caught in the seam of your Shirt collar, you know what I mean). In writing this, my eccentricities are blinding me from my original point as I start to reminisce on the years of visiting various Hairdressers who never failed to cover me in my own shorn locks.

I’ve yet to get a haircut without requiring an immediate shower to remove the sharp yet microscopic off-cuts of unwanted hair length from my ear holes, face, neck, back and chest. Why wash my hair before you cut it if I’m going to have to re wash immediately? And, how can you charge me for a ‘Wash, Cut and Style’ knowing full well I’ll be re-washing and therefore re-styling?

No, I want a dry hair cut, without pre-wash or post-cut style. As a result, I want a discount. Furthermore, if you intend on showering me in my own follicular waste, I want money towards the cleaning or replacement of the garment covering my upper body. A visit to the Hairdresser is not my way of conceding my T-shirt to the depths of my wardrobe due to newfound itchiness.

Back on point – Yoghurt and Fruit. It all seems trivial now, following my shared thoughts on hair. However, I can’t be the only person in the world to get that stomach-somersaulting feeling when I see the putrid, thick skin that forms at the top of a Yoghurt pot. You know, you peel back the foil lid of the plastic pot and collected around the edges in a gooey death-ring formation is an unnecessary collection of Yoghurt. Firstly, it’s a waste of perfectly good food, but much more importantly, it’s gloop and although I’m aware that it’s as untarnished as the ‘normal’ yoghurt collectively based below in the pot, there is no excuse for it to separate and adopt a thicker texture to the rest. The same rule applies to the layer which covers the inside of the foil lid. What really makes me sick is when people lick the lid. For lack of a better word: EEW!

Second point – I understand that when Oxygen touches the flesh of an Apple, it turns brown (although the moment is does so, I refuse to eat it) and I accept that (well, ish). But what I’m not willing to make a concession with is... if they can genetically modify fruit, please create some sort of Banana with armoured skin. There is nothing worse than buying a bunch of Banana’s, waiting a day or two for them to ripen whilst not touching them (no dropping, throwing or moving) then finally peeling back the dark yellow skin, only to find massive bruises. I don’t want to eat a piece of fruit which resembles a Rugby players’ leg.

Rant done, but I’ll be back.

Are the ‘oldies’ a shiny, rich yellow-orange colour and worthy of being likened to the precious metallic element globally considered as being a monetary benchmark? Why are oldies ‘golden’? Are the originals the best?

Now, this is a blog entry, so I’ll expand on what Is clearly a broad subject. Let’s make this topical and keep on point, as the rule/classification of ‘golden oldies’ can and is applied to all ‘originals’, be they TV shows, Art, Music, Movies and pretty much any other man-made creations which over time are updated, refined and altered.

Clearly, fashion dictates design in a big way, although is not the sole driving force behind change, as conditional requirements force the use of new materials in order to adapt an object to use under varied circumstances.

Let us put this into a context and as it’s my blog, I’m fortunate enough to be in a position where I may direct this onto a blog train track of my choice.

Being a geek at heart, I will therefore make this specific to electronic devices and even more specific, three categories: Headphones, Turntables and Mixers. Furthermore, going back as far as the first ever Turntable and Headphones seems a step too far so our starting point is when I began my DJ career.

I actually didn’t own Turntables until I was 17 years old (although I had plenty of records!), four years after my DJing began. Instead I’d mix on friends’ Decks until my Parents decided it wasn’t a fad and were kind enough to buy me some second-hand Turntables, originally owned by a well known English D’n’B DJ.

My original DJ set –up consisted of 2x Technics 1210 mkII, Sony MDRV 500 Headphones and some 2 Channel RadioShack mixer.

Clearly the set-up changed and I soon upgraded. However I still own the Decks and simply don’t need to touch them, bumps and scratch marks aside, they are perfect, even if they’re well over 10 years old.

I remember the times before ‘everyone’ had Technics turntables, people had all sorts of brands with belt drive movement and cheap plastic facades. Those were the days – imagine trying to mix two records which were spinning at inconsistent speeds! Well, the 1210’s represented the antithesis of turntables and everyone aimed to own a pair.

Even with Vestax, Stanton and Numark all releasing ‘tables with more powerful motors and technological updates, the classic 1210 is yet to be dethroned and remains the industry standard in all nightclubs.

My Sony headphones were OK, but as soon as I could afford to upgrade, I did so. But me being me, I had to research. I’d seen some older DJ’s using skimpy, ugly looking ‘Cans’ with twisted wires and electro tape holding them together and I’d always wondered...’why??!?!?!?!’.

It turned out that they we Sennheiser HD-25sp cans. So I read up and learnt that these basic, plain headphones were monsters, the stats outshone all others which included competition from Technics, Sony, Pioneer. Whilst the others admittedly looked aesthetically pleasing, the Sennheiser’s – then a relatively unknown, niche brand – were statistically unparalleled AND all parts were replaceable, so they’re headphones for life. The sound’s rich, clear and the design blocks outside noise well. I decided to go up the Sennheiser pecking order and opt for the HD25 model which had a knot-free cable and more sturdy head band. I’m using them whilst writing this, I’ve owned them for years and they’re like new.

Are there better options available on the market now? It’s possible, but I wouldn’t know – I have no reason to look.

My original mixer, retrospectively, was abysmal. At the time it was great to me – it was my first and I was ecstatic to simply have a mixer. For the first year of owning it I was totally happy, it served the purpose. But mixer’s are strange objects. I have an emotional attachment to my Decks and to a certain extent, my Headphones – I think they’re the best and won’t hear anything to counter my factual opinion!

I upgraded my mixer to a Stanton SK2F Limited Edition but as much as I liked my new mixer, I had a wandering eye, committing mixer bigamy on whatever sweet piece of mixer goodness was released into the market.

All DJ’s are mixer agnostic. Why? Easy enough to explain – we want reliability from Turntables and quality from Headphones. These are elements which require consistent performance. Mixer’s however are the element which when changed, allow DJ’s to expand their techniques. A paddle-shift gear changes on a sports car will allow for a quicker gear shift, thus the race driver can concentrate on winning the race. A zip-fly on a pair of jeans was a nice addition to speed up and simplify getting dressed, no more fiddly buttons. The Apple iPhone allows for a full media experience, no need for a portable DVD player, separate MP3 player or PDA. I think you get the direction I’m headed, mixers are the element to a DJ’s arsenal which allows for innovation and adaptation – it excites us.

The Technics 1210 wont relinquish its thrown. It will never be replaced by another Turntable for the ‘industry standard’ title. Mark my words, the day that it steps down. Its replacement will be a fully Digital alternative. It’s a true Golden Oldie. As for the Headphones and Mixer, there is no such thing as a Golden Oldie – there’s always room for improvement – lighter headphones, wireless, better crossfader, increased functionality etc.

It’ll always amaze me that once in a blue moon, a designer or engineer will produce a revelation, something so good that it is unnecessary and near on impossible to improve upon.

The Technics 1210, perfect, Golden.